I'm so proud of her. Her story of stealth that she came home with from school today could have brought tears to my eyes if I had just watched Marlee and Me or My Dog Skip. It began with a basic comment about how doing #2 in public can always be awkward. Sometimes, you just gotta do it, but we all know we'd prefer the comfort of our own bathroom.
She was in the middle of gym class and well, the urge hit. I think she believed she hit a prime moment of opportunity because no one else was in the locker room and every stall was free. Jackpot. She was all up in there doing her business not bothering anyone when it happens. *Footsteps* Shit. In more ways than one. Ha. No but seriously I can only imagine what that felt like to her. Probably one of the worst situations one can be confronted with. And once you start it's that in between feeling of should I just finish or just save it for later. Crude, I know, but everyone shits. President Obama. Emma Watson. Dr. Phil. Even Angelina Jolie. Although she probably manages to do that sexy. I'm so jealous. I'd like to be a sexy shitter. How sexy do you have to be to even have that image be appealing? This is getting very gross if you start putting images in your head. Sorry.
The footsteps stop at the mirror in front of the sink and Mack hears,
"What is that smell? Why can't people wait until they get home? You really have to do that kind of stuff at school. No."
Once she got past the initial mortification of the situation, she thought quick. I still don't comprehend how she managed to do this, but she slid out of the stall and swiftly ran to the other side of the bathroom behind the lockers. Then casually walked back to the sink to wash her hands, says hi to the girl and proceeds to say,
"What the hell is that smell?"
The girl agrees with her enthusiastically and they share an exchange of words about the nerve of people shitting during school hours.
I can't express enough how much this identifies my sister as being my sister.
xxxx
A
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