Give That Back. It's Not Candy.

Sometimes I am swamped with so much reading to do for class that I think I would rather have busy work as assignments.  Busy work I can complete.  There is a definite end to worksheets.  Reading I will never finish.  There is always more reading for any class I can do.  I will never be caught up.  Even if I do catch up, I could always read ahead so I have less to do the following week.  I never get this opportunity of course because I'm always behind.  Even when I try to complete readings I can't get through a whole chapter without reading 7 consecutive pages and not knowing what happened for at least 2 of those pages.  Thus, I have to go back and re-read or accept the fact that the plot is going to become very much filled with holes later on.  It's a never ending cycle of torture, which is dramatic because it's not like what I have to read about is terrible it's just not readings I get to choose.  And the second I'm forced to read something I didn't pick it becomes instantly that more dreadful.  I would list all the readings I have to do but no one wants to read that list, especially me.  It would only highlight all the work I won't complete this weekend.

Instead, I will start off my weekend hanging out with my two little friends.  They are 4 and 2.  I call them my friends because I can say I honestly enjoy spending time with them.  These feelings may be partially influenced because I get paid very well to do it, I have access to a very beautiful kitchen with a wide variety of healthy food choices and this bangin' homemade trail mix, and it never fails that I get to watch a legit good Disney movie.  No, that definitely fails sometimes.  For a while they were on this kick with watching Hop consecutively, which is that computer graphic/reality movie about the Easter bunny named E.B. with the voice of Russell Brand and I had to watch it 5 times the same night, but that was only a phase.  Because it was Russell Brand I watched the movie pretending the bunny was on the side practically a male prostitute who doesn't get paid for his work.  It was a little more entertaining in my mind.

Here's your real rabbit, kids.

The movie was mildly decent the first time, and got progressively more awful as the night went on.  Last time we watched Toy Story 2 which was AWESOME.  Of course, I would still love these children and care for them even if they wanted to watch Hop tonight, I would just probably hide the DVD because if it's out of sight it's out of their mind.  I'm kidding.  I will do anything for these kids mainly because they think I'm funny.  And I can tell they think I'm smart because I know how to read and I also pulled the "Oh when you're older like me you'll know what that's for" (this occurred when the girl pulled a tampon out of my bag and questioned whether it was candy under the wrapper).  No, not candy and please give that back before mom comes home...

  Moral:  If you think I'm funny and smart I will do nice things for you.  See how simple that is if you want good things from me?  Start throwing compliments my way and I'll throw back kindness.  Fair trade...and my friends wonder why I'm a bitch to them.  Kidding.  Maybe?

I hung out with Leah yesterday and Genna and I were pumped that another person got to see our awesome apartment.  Hopefully she will come back since she saw how accommodating our place is.  We accept visitors and sleepovers.  This is limited to if we know you or not, and if we feel safe and clean with you sleeping on our couch.  Bring gifts and maybe you can share one of our beds.  You don't have to be like, super clean though, because showering to us, is a chore, and no one is perfect when it comes to maintaining chores.

xxxx
A

Rebel Alert at the Library

I'm going to get fired.  As if you don't hear me complain about my library job enough via social media, I'm here to tell you why I will be fired.  One of my life draining duties is entitled, "shelf reading".  It is exactly what it sounds like.  I'm sent to a designated few rows in the library for an entire hour and am supposed to read call numbers to make sure the books are in order, while straightening any shelves that appear disheveled.  I took this quite seriously as a freshman and slowly became a little more distracted as the semesters went by.  Granted, I do understand why we need to make sure books are in order.  What if people need one?  BUT there must be a more productive way than reading each call number.  I throw a party in my aisle every fifth book I find misplaced.  Haven't received an invite?  Probably because I NEVER FIND BOOKS OUT OF PLACE.  I need to look harder.

  We're allowed to have our headphones in so by sophomore year I was becoming a little more focused on the playlists I had going than the books in front of me.  Junior year I would have my phone and text here and there because I'm not cool or normal and don't have a smart phone that does both*.

 Senior year:

Coffee,  & provisions in the form of granola and chocolate chip cake.

I do owe the food today to a little mouse named Genna who dropped it off for me.  I usually bring something of my own but I made a big mistake in the form of not wearing something with pockets.
The good news, even if I blow with apathy at shelf reading I'm one of the fastest book shelvers they got, man.  I think my position may be safe.  Plus I'm a great library greeter.

My second "job" tonight is babysitting.  If you're not a babysitter and don't have your own kids to babysit (IT'S NOT CALLED BABYSITTING IF THEY'RE YOUR OWN KIDS, DAD), you should do it.  Sometimes it's challenging when you have a disagreement with the children, or repetitive when a kid wants to watch Hop 6 times in an evening, but for the most part it's a great gig.  Lately I've been going to babysit and the kids are already in bed when I get there so I just have to pay attention to those creepy new age video cameras where I can watch them sleep.  Talk about unnerving, and a freakishly perfect setup for a scene from Paranormal Activity.

xxxx
A
*Christmas gift ideas.  Only 3 months away guys.