"Oh! Cinderella?" No, I'm a Pirate..

For someone who isn't crazy about fall and is less than thrilled about October in general, I celebrated with festivities pretty much the entire weekend.  Like I wrote previously, I did the whole haunted house thing Friday night, chilled with Mack most of the day Saturday (completely avoiding my epidemiology project), attended Jay and John's Halloween bash that evening, and spent yesterday carving arguably the third worst pumpkin out of like the 10 people in the room.  Jenna and I went all out for our costumes for the party and were hoping it wasn't going to be like some parties that say "wear a costume if you'd like" and there's one person who sticks out like a sore thumb.  We did not want to be those phalanges, but we said YOLO.

Luckily a good portion of the group did follow suit and dressed up amusingly.  

Pirate (or Cinderella in Rags) and John Donkey Democrat

The fun that I had Saturday night outweighed the regret I had the following morning of choosing to end my night drinking the Jungle Juice they provided.  Last night I saw "The Perks of Being a Wallflower", and if you haven't read the book you should.  The movie did a great job of following the book but I do sort of wish they chose an American actress to play the role of Sam, the American high school student.  Emma Watson is beautiful and a great actress but I kept hearing her accent come up.  It could have been because I was sort of looking for it and therefore just created it.  Seeing the movie was a nice break from remembering being admonished by my father for having to drive back to Cleveland in Hurricane Sandy this morning.  It's funny because I was getting yelled at before the actual occurrence of me driving to school even happened.  So I was just a mess most of last night because of that and I was so tired and on edge and all round not good company.  I will be so grateful when this day is over and I can sleep for hours on end.  I'm currently very sleep deprived as you can probably tell, I'm switching ideas every other sentence.  

One more idea switch, I hate self check-out lines at stores.  Those do not save time, I don't care how long the line is.  We used one last night at Wal-Mart, and I offered to bag Connor's purchases for him after he scanned them because I am a superb and thoughtful girlfriend.  Worst.  Idea.  Ever.  After three items I caused the "Please Wait for Assistance" screen and loud verbal message to pop up and we just waited till it went away.  Then the screen popped up like two more times throughout the transaction.  It shouldn't be as hard as they make it.  I'm just putting the stuff in a bag, why do I have to set it down first so it gets weighed.  It's all just a sloppy system that I never want to deal with again.  I'm pretty sure Connor doesn't want me to deal with it again either, mainly when he's with me.  

Happy Monday and endless rain should cancel classes.

xxxx

A

I Wish I Had My Sword Last Night

I completed my main goal for October: Attending a Haunted House.  A truck full of myself and 8 other people headed to Ghost Lake about 45 minutes away and enjoyed shitting our pants in a number of haunted houses.  They were actually pretty sweet, there were like seven different attractions/houses/mazes, and I do not understand how I can yelp as high pitched as I do.  I want to be able to do that on command because it's just this shrill of a shriek and it's seriously so high I don't understand how it gets up there.  If I wasn't me I'd be very annoyed by myself. The houses got progressively scarier depending on what we all talked about while waiting in the lines to actually go through them.  For example, after the first two we were discussing how "easy" it'd be for a murder rampage to occur.  He/she just dresses up as a scary person (mask, makeup, dark outfit) and hides in the house, stabs one at a time, and if they yell it's all part of the environment.  No suspicions.  Until people stop coming out of the houses.  But no one really stands at the exit, they only check tickets at the entrance.  The only dudes hanging out the end are the ones who chase you out with chainsaws.  And I forget who yelled it after the first clown maze, it might have been Bryant exclaiming, "DON'T RUN FROM THE CHAINSAWS THAT'S WHEN THEY'LL CHASE YOU".  Meanwhile I see Rakim sprinting in circles trying to avoid the chainsaw man.  Nice.

The scariest part of the night came during the last attraction which was an old ass roller coaster that they ran in the pitch dark.  This was scary for all the wrong reasons.  I think it's the oldest wooden coaster in existence and for that I did not think I would be alive at the end of it, based on the noises it was making alone.  Parris lost his iPhone on the coaster.  We think he left it in the seat and then someone else picked it up.  AKA: stole it.  Amazingly iPhones have that sick feature of locating one another, so Brenna plugged his info into her phone and we were actually able to track where the iPhone was going.    As if it had a life of its own.  So of course we followed it down the darkest of dark roads and cornfields, the perfect setup for a 21st Century ;Children of the Corn' horror film.  So here we all are stuffed like sardines in this SUV tracking the locations of his lost iPhone down freaky roads and Rakim and Connor are making a list out loud of whose going to be murdered first in the setup.  I still resent them for murdering me off pretty close to first because I was the "scene vegetarian character".  Rude.
We pulled over where the iPhone supposedly stopped moving and a couple of the boys searched around the houses nearby, not looking suspicious at all for 1:30 am.  Somehow Rak saw the phone on the other side of the road blinking in the grass.  The supposed thieves must have thrown it out the window when they realized they were dealing with the wrong 9 jacked-up-on-fear people.  Happy ending to a long, long night.

Tonight Jay and John are having a halloween party and I will be utilizing one of Mackenzie's old dance costumes because I am cheap and they're cute.  Plus they are ridiculously expensive and my parents were like PLEASE GET MORE USE OUT OF THEM.  I think I'm going as a pirate.  My mom was helping with my costume and I asked if she had a sword I could take.  In my head I'm picturing a light weight, smaller sized one that  I can easily attach to a belt and just have as an accessory.   She got really excited because she did indeed have a sword in her closet (why?) so she thought she could help. Um, my mom doesn't mess around.

There is no way I'm taking this with me because I felt too dangerous flailing it around even sober.  Add people in a drunken stupor to the environment and I do not want to be responsible for anything involving my weapon.  It is heavy and intense and looks like it came right out of Middle Earth.  And my dad said he wouldn't let me take it with me even if I wanted to.

xxxx

A

Did Your Dad Buy Your Lexus Too?

I had full intention of writing a blog last night but when it came down to it I decided I couldn't be bothered to type since I had been on my laptop for what felt like the whole freaking day.  So I VIDEO blogged.  Woo!  Then I spent 25 minutes attempting to upload it onto my actual blog post because nothing was working.  Ultimately, I went through the trouble of getting my YouTube account back up and put it on there...then linked my YouTube link to my blog.  So many failures involved.  It wasn't loud enough and I don't know how to work YouTube channels and it all just looked stupid.  Why can't I just upload my damn video straight on my blog I DO NOT KNOW.  I thought I was saving time by making a video last night and I ended up wasting 150% more time by trying to figure out a video on blogger.

The video was a straight up 3 minute rant about this girl I was checking out at the library.  Checking her books out, not her bod.  A little box on the library computer screen popped up saying "DO NOT LET HER CHECK BOOKS OUT SHE OWES $92 IN FINES".  That's not verbatim but more or less it was the situation.  I kindly relayed this message to her and said if you owe more than fifty bucks you can't check books out.  She's all sassed up and sayin, "I'm pretty sure I've never checked books out at the library so I don't know how those fines have even aquired."  WELL HUNNY THEY DID.  I went back to get my supervisor and he told her that he can override the issue and she can still check books out she'll just have to pay the fine before she graduates.  Because her account was on the screen I could tell she was a senior so I highly doubted she had never checked books out before anyways.  Plus, I can see what the fines were for on the screen.  She asked my supervisor so politely what the fines were for and he told her it was for some books and movies that she never returned freshman year.  Of course, when my somewhat-attractive-for-an-older-man and chiseled and tan supervisor tells her she has fines she laughs and suddenly remembers.  But when I, the very responsible yet young looking library assistant, tell her she has fines that she needs to pay to get her new books she thinks I'm full of shit and don't know what I'm talking about.  Newsflash Gretchen Weiners wanna be, I DO.

As if I wasn't already annoyed enough, and clearly showing it with my 'If you talk anymore I'll need a pen to gouge my eyes out' look, she proceeded to tell us that she will simply have her dad write a check for the fine and bring it back next week.  Your dad?! You're a senior in college!   Ok, I understand that we are college students in a time of economic hardship.  Most of us rely on our parents for some financial assistance.  Some more than others.  For example, I only rely on my parents for the small payments, like my apartment rent...and car insurance...and car repairs... ok and food (RARELY) if I end up putting too much in my cart that I can't afford.  If I came to my parents to pay for a fine that I aquired on my own over not returning books or movies, they would tell me to figure it out on my own and sell my body if I must.  Then my mom would laugh because she knows I wouldn't last a day in that field.  
xxxx
A

Is Anything Sacred Anymore?

I knew this day would come.  I knew it I knew it I knew it.  And it's here.  I was having such a great day too.  Extremely uneventful, yet highly productive.  I couldn't fall asleep last night after laying in bed for like 2 hours, probably because I was having an intense text conversation with C so my phone was vibrating my mattress every few minutes.  I was having like mad mood swings from it too.  First I was just annoyed, then I was pissed off and upset, then I was thinking how I'm blowing this out of proportion and exaggerating my feelings (which is almost always the case).  Sometimes I try so hard to just stop saying things because I know I should just end the conversation where it is but I think my pride gets in the way.  NO I AM GOING TO BE THE LAST PERSON TO SAY SOMETHING AND I WILL BE RIGHT ABOUT.  He'll literally say, "Ok I know, you're right".  And I'll still have to be like, "I know you know.  I just said it because it's true".  Like, wtf am I even saying now?  Was that necessary?  Is he even taking me seriously on the other end of this text message?  The next morning I look back and I wonder what I was even getting angry about in the first place.  Note: This is not me agreeing with all the guys who say girls are crazy and are never pleased.  This is me saying few boys rarely know how to deal with girls who are crazy and never pleased because of boys.  Honestly, boys, I don't know what to tell you.  Your safest bet is wait it out and she'll (um, maybe) get over it herself, which is usually what I do.  Until I find something else that I don't like (and he probably can't even control) and can get real sassy about.  It's a mad cycle.

So by the time the first hour and a half of laying in bed passed I was cursing because I figured if I spent that time working on my paper due Wednesday I'd be at least halfway done already.  I think that's what gave me the motivation to sit down at 1pm today and knock it out in 2 hours.  Bam.  It's a bit shorter than the original guidelines given by the professor but if that ever becomes a real grading issue I explain that the content is far more important than trying to stretch out the information with poor writing technique.  That usually gives me my points back.  I realize it's kind of sad that I have to sell my work and it can't just speak for itself but that's clearly an issue of work ethic.

Back to "I knew this day would come."   MY MOM FOUND MY BLOG AND READ IT. *cringe*  She proceeded to text me throughout this process.  I thought I convinced her not to read it when she initially told me she found it.  I tried telling her this was my personal diary and private to myself and she needs to respect that.  She said it's a public blog and she has access.  Ali-0 Mom-1  I said I don't read her thoughts about her life in her personal diary that she keeps next to her bed on her shelf.  She said yes you do read that.  (Ok, yes, I do.  WHO IS PERFECT IN THIS WORLD?  I used to read her diary a lot.  She caught on and started writing in ridiculous abbreviations and complete code). Ali-0 Mom-2
I know she started reading my blog when I got the following text messages within the span of 15 minutes.  My mom doesn't usually follow the rule where it's considered impolite to send someone repetitive text messages without getting a response from the person you're sending to, as you can tell from the following.

"Wow I just found it"
"My mom loves that cat more than me"
"Really spermicidal lube u r sooo busted"
"Even ur dad, gyno appt, is nothing sacred"
"U r vulgur, no more swearing or asking if ur ass itches"
"Really?   hymen..  that's wrong"
"Ur not a sweet girl"
"I will always love u"

Yikes.
xxxx
A